Wednesday, June 30, 2004

the dark veil of hope covers our eyes and we wish for things that can never be
our dreams filled with longings for the impossible
our thoughts, delusions of what we cant attain
like a river of warmth coursing through us, melting away the pain
and then we awake to realize that none of it was so
nor will it ever be

and then, its time

posted by kelly at 11:44 PM

Wednesday, April 21, 2004

his gaze fills me with the darkness
taking me away from life
and you
cold heart, cruel words, filling hearts with
silent tears and prayers for death

and i drift further into the peace i seek
fighting for the only freedom
i can foresee
from mutterings and hate filled stares
to sleep, to dream eternity

and she kissed the flame of perfect desire
falling into a place of forever
and soft whispers
perpetual i love you

and there i will belong to you forever

posted by kelly at 1:09 PM

Thursday, January 08, 2004

youre there, and the peace
but the pain brings back the darkness
and i wish for death
for sleep that will not come
for your arms and gentle touch
your kiss upon my forehead
i feel lost, and afraid
enveloped in the blackness

but i know that tomorrow
the sun will rise again
and smiling through the torment in my head
i lay down and remember your embrace
with a wish in my heart for soft sleep

posted by kelly at 5:11 AM

Friday, December 26, 2003

there is my imperfection
it cries for you
my need, absolute
my desire, eternal
aching
the yearning within my soul
overpowering
your touch fills my dreams

posted by kelly at 7:03 AM

Thursday, December 11, 2003

i remember the last time
i touched your hair
soft, flowing between my fingers
holding you gently
your breath slow and easy
as you found rest

watching you sleep
knowing the time was near
and that i could never let go
of your grace
keeping every second in my heart
safe, forever
with me for always

god couldnt take you away
though he tried
and i cursed him for his mercilessness
and lost myself in grief
til i realized you were here
inside of me

and the white doves sing your name
softly in my ear

posted by kelly at 10:01 PM

Wednesday, December 03, 2003

the sun lives in his kiss
his eyes, the stars
and i miss the tender lips
that fill my dreams

posted by kelly at 3:21 AM

Tuesday, September 30, 2003

she had a rose upon her window sill, oh she loved it so. she tended and
watered it, trying so hard to make it smile at her. it would bloom and then
fade, bloom and then fade, longer and longer between the bright times. she
forgot how beautiful the blooms could be after a while, she so seldom saw
them now. she forgot to water it, she forgot to put it in the sun. she
forgot that she loved it. it died, she woke up one morning and it was gone,
faded to the roots, to never bloom again. and she cried, her tears washing
the dead leaves.

and then she crawled back into bed and had the dreams and lived inside of
them, where she wasnt alone anymore, she was surrounded by the songs, the
man took her heart and mind and said he'd told her, she never did have a
green thumb, and she knew that he was right.

posted by kelly at 3:16 PM

Tuesday, September 23, 2003

loopy made me do this

i look up at the darkened sky
and see my loopy hanging high,
his cock so big it blocks the sun,
i wish i was his honey bun

posted by kelly at 4:47 PM

she wanted to die more than she wanted to live. her peace was gone, only the promise held it now. she clung to it and yet couldnt fulfill her dream. he was there, holding her here. the reason for life, a life she had cast aside many years ago, tempting fate to take her, on the brink of death finally happy. and then that was taken from her. she didnt understand why others didnt see that death was not a fearful thing, but an absolution from pain. the songs in her head, the music like dirges in her heart, she felt them every moment and only he distracted her, but now he was gone. there was a ghost of him in his place, she had left him and come back and he was gone, someone else had taken his place, loving her, but not him. lost in a world apart from hers, never knowing the joy of the song, the pain and pleasure and burning desire. she had hidden in false peace, had found coping things that made her stay, they were taken from her when he disappeared. she felt alone, shed liked alone til him. he had changed her and she couldnt live with what she had become, loving and kind, caring and needy. she who had despised all was now 'an angel'. no, that could never be, and he was gone anyway. it was time to listen to the song again, to feel its call and await its coming, the moment of peace, of reprisal. she had found hope, she had lost it that day. the other things didnt matter, someone said i want to die, she wanted to scream that she did too, more than he could imagine. but she went away and eased the ache, but only a little, he'd reminded her again with his promise of death. she was jealous that he could go and she could not. she had earned her place and it had been taken from her. she had given it freely to one who showed her the stars, then he took them away, not his love, but the things that kept her sane. now is the time, her heart sings to her, you cant ever leave me he pleads. she bleeds and tries and fails again to find the man she met one night. she thinks hes gone forever, and the song gets louder. she understood the dream.

posted by kelly at 5:13 AM

trapped in purgatory,
a lifeless object, alive
awaiting reprisal
and death
i said, she said
death will be the acquisition

the sky is turning red
return to power
draws near
fall onto me
onto, errerr errerr
fall onto me
the sky's crimson tears

abolish the rules,
abolish the rules
made of stone

pierced from below
souls of my treacherous past
betrayed by many
now, ornaments dripping above
awaiting the hour of reprisal
mmm...
your time slips away
raining blood
raining blood
from a lacerated sky
bleeding its horror,
creating my structure
now I shall
reign in blood...

- tori amos

posted by kelly at 5:07 AM

Monday, September 22, 2003

i want to die, so does he, i cant bear to hear his wish
so i leave again and shut my ears and listen only to my own
beating so strongly in my heart, willing me there
taking me into the darkness i cant escape


i thought he heard me, i thought it mattered, im always wrong
my words were empty when they touched his ears
and now hes going away again, forever?
i can barely hold on myself

every time you say it, it reminds me of how i want death
how i dream it and taste it and live it now
every time you say it it breaks my heart again
and i cant stop you anymore

and you cant stop me

posted by kelly at 4:41 PM

clouds, wisps across the darkening sky
a building breeze kisses my face desperately
my fingers reach out to touch the air
as our lips meet
the bracelet you didnt give me sparkles
and i know that there is light
deep in my heart

posted by kelly at 4:33 PM

Sunday, September 21, 2003

the darkness cried out to be kissed, its moist promise of protection from all fear
she pursed her lips and reached up into its depths and caressed it gently
feeling it swirl around her, covering her, swallowing her into its black soul
it held her so tightly that she forgot the light, and had she not
would have had no desire for its false promises, its lazy ways
she chose, she embraced, she lived in the grasp of the night
for the promise of forever and nothingness and an empty heart
she knew that nothing was more than the daylight had brought
sadness of yesterdays ringing in her ears, healed by the moist air
letting go, enveloped in its velvet wings, disappeared in the night

posted by kelly at 5:00 AM

Thursday, September 18, 2003

i cant write about the birds today
or the trees
or how the breeze feels when it
whispers against my skin
i cant see the daylight
i cant see the stars
all i know is the lost
song in my heart

posted by kelly at 5:19 AM

Saturday, September 13, 2003

the gentle breeze on her face filled her mind with dreams of things she did not know, she felt someone in the air as it caressed her lips, she needed him, this ghostly being who did not exist. she closed her eyes and saw him, soft and warm, a smile and a hand reaching for hers. he held her in his arms and they danced, their feet not touching the ground, his breath on her neck tickling, so sweetly, making her body tingle.surrounded by stars, safe in his arms, she knew at last, she had found her heaven. he lifted her into his arms and carried her toward the brightest of the stars, she knew that life was behind her, joy ahead. holding him, she went willingly to that place of which she had dreamed.

posted by kelly at 3:56 AM

Wednesday, September 03, 2003

the hole was there so of course she fell into it. it was deep so of course the bottom was filled with water, stagnant, the walls slippery, the air putrid.she realized that no one would hear her if she cried out so she did all the was left to her and laid gently back into the water, letting it flow over her body, sinking softly into the sludge at the bottom. and so of course she died and upon dying went directly to hell. but what the heck, they even had a fan club in her name, and death was good to her. except all she could think of was how she would love to feel that slimy water once again upon her flesh, and damn, is it hot in here?

posted by kelly at 6:56 AM

Saturday, August 09, 2003

my heart ached, and my head
i knew that my time was short
and i had done all that i could
to fulfill my dreams

i looked back sadly at the few i loved
and hoped for understanding
i couldnt take the pain anymore
though i loved them still

i remembered the dream
of life in another place
where i had choices and i chose you
i remembered and i closed my eyes

holding your hand i passed to
that place, so gently
there was no pain
no confusion or tears

only peaceful oblivion
and waiting for you
the haze clearing from my mind
i could finally see

and all was beauty, perfection



'Last night I swallowed the drug and floated dreamily into the golden valley and the shadowy groves; and when I came this time to the antique wall, I saw that the small gate of bronze was ajar. From beyond came a glow that weirdly lit the giant twisted trees and the tops of the buried temples, and I drifted on songfully, expectant of the glories of the land from whence I should never return.

But as the gate swung wider and the sorcery of the drug and the dream pushed me through, I knew that all sights and glories were at an end; for in that new realm was neither land nor sea, but only the white void of unpeopled and illimitable space. So, happier than I had ever dared hope to be, I dissolved again into that native infinity of crystal oblivion from which the daemon Life had called me for one brief and desolate hour. '

- hp lovecraft

posted by kelly at 6:47 AM

Thursday, July 03, 2003

birdsongs fill my burning brain
and the words from last night
the anger and i cant come back
sometimes things break
and can never be fixed
and doubt happens for a reason

if only you'd made me smile
just once, soft
our kiss might have promised
a tomorrow

posted by kelly at 6:46 AM

Tuesday, July 01, 2003
dont count the stars
they may be gone tomorrow
nor beg the moon
he'll ignore your pleas
and the sun hides from the light

he ran to the station
to meet her train
she thought again
and continued on
as he waited for his only love

tomorrow filled hearts become disappointed
as the wheels of time
crush naked souls
passion becomes a dream
of yesterday

she carried the weight of her heart
so long, so far
her body ached as she stood
at the edge of the abyss
and smiling, she leapt

posted by kelly at 5:26 AM

Monday, June 30, 2003

it follows as though it were not real
and yet i feel it on my flesh
blackness, transparent and warm
but cold to the touch
drowning me in its peace

my mind is flooded with nothingness and dreams
of death, of rest eternal
dark fingers tickle my heart to ache
and a sigh fills every breath
while others die, within

empty and full, of everything and nothing
my soul pierced
by an arrow of delusion
warm blood grows thick upon my eyes
and i can no longer see

what is to see but nothing?
what is to feel but this?
it creeps closer with every beat
to an ending that will never be
or is

posted by kelly at 6:07 AM

Saturday, June 28, 2003
there were smiles and then something
darkness running into my eyes
filling my mind and then my heart
i can feel it, empty and cold
and i am completely alone

its been there before
your light chased it away
now it encompasses my soul
and i feel death breathing on my neck
softly

posted by kelly at 9:27 PM

Friday, June 27, 2003

inside is cold and hard and aching
no desires, no needs anymore
sadness fills her days
and her nights moreso
and she wanders, wondering

in the dark there are no tears
only stillness and peace
walking alone, unafraid
the pain ebbs
and she hears the words

there is a dance in the breeze
of the night, of the stillness
only the moon to watch her
and see what is in her heart
or not

she lives there now
hiding from the light of the day
from the pain of the sun
losing all that she loved
finding it again in the dark

posted by kelly at 5:36 AM

Friday, June 20, 2003

this beautiful rose i held within my hand
soft velvet, in perfect bloom
slowly withered and died
its petals dripping between my fingers
falling gently to the ground

gazing at my most precious thing
laying dead at my feet
i watered its remnants with tears
but to no avail
and i longed to join it in death

posted by kelly at 2:25 AM

Tuesday, June 17, 2003

theres nothing left
but an empty shell
that used to be me
nothing to hang onto
but tears in the night

love was a hazard i didnt count on
caring too much was my undoing
and i flounder not knowing
lost and afraid that i cant
letting go of you

and i hear the words
but they mean nothing
all i can see are the tears in my eyes
so i fade and i feel and i wish
maybe tomorrow the sun wont rise

posted by kelly at 5:07 AM

Sunday, June 15, 2003

how long is too long and how short to short?
love is a bird flying too low in the breeze
vulnerable and beautiful
and the moon climbs in the sky while the bird drifts away
into the night

winter comes and i look for him
i listen for his call and hear nothing
flown away, leaving only memories of his song
only an empty place in my heart
i wait, but he may never return to fill me again


posted by kelly at 7:24 PM


you can look but you cant touch
the cans open but the beans are dry
and my hearts laying on the floor in a puddle of wasted tears
i wipe the lens and see a world of agony
inside of me

youre beyond range but i aim and i miss
i miss you every day and drop the remains at your feet
clickety clak, and a rumble as the doors close
and home is so far from us but why
the water calls to the sun and swallows it in a kiss

so the dark and the wind hold me
and i float away in pain
a cricket in my head calling your name
the fires burn the hills and envelope the path
and a rumble dies inside the flames


posted by kelly at 6:20 PM

Sunday, June 01, 2003

once upon a time
she fell in love
completely
and forever.


posted by kelly at 5:34 AM


my feelings were always bullshit to you
you were the grown up one
so i cried and you told me in your way
what a child i was
and i cried some more and didnt tell

everything meant more than me to you
you didnt have time
but i waited and i didnt complain
much, i tried
and then you were free and not to me

so i went away and i cried some more
and you called it bullshit
i looked at the word and remembered my dad
how he was always
looking down at me, talking down

i said goodbye to you in my heart
and felt it break again
promising myself
no more bullshit or being a child
im not, i feel, i felt you


posted by kelly at 4:14 AM

Tuesday, May 20, 2003

i want to fly to your lips, invisible
run unseen fingers over your flesh
and hear you giggle


posted by kelly at 8:43 PM

Thursday, May 08, 2003

when we're done what will you do?
when i'm gone and you're alone
will you sit and stare at the sky and wish
and leave life behind?

will you find another love to take your heart?
and show her what you showed me
the man who stole mine
let her breathe your breath?

will you take her to that special place?
laying down in the grass and kissing her lips like they were mine
will you love her for her
or for me?

will you find the path again and follow it?
the one to that wonderful life
filled with learning and love
the one you were meant to walk

dont chase butterflies and bunnies
chase your dream
you had it before you had me, dont let go
embrace it, you can be everything

posted by kelly at 9:25 PM

Tuesday, May 06, 2003

she hid in the darkness, where there was no pain, alone. solitude felt good, like sitting on a fluffy cloud of peace. she avoided her friends and family, seeking only introspection and quiet. the pain had taught her well. she knew what made life liveable, made the burning inside something she could flow with, like a tide she would ride it til it passed. and they all said poor ana. poor girl, some thought her lost in mental illness not wanting human contact, others lost in her massive ego, and the ones who truly cared, they knew it was the pain, they knew that it was the search for tranquility. they were the ones she had time for when they needed her. but even they would pressure her for more than she could give to them, even them she pushed aside. the birds were singing and the sun rising. she was alone. life was perfect but for one thing, and that she was learning to live without.


posted by kelly at 5:29 AM

Sunday, May 04, 2003

flinch

why cant there just be love?
no ruins in the mist
gentle kisses in the rain
but then comes the lightning
and destroys everything
i feel or will

my feet tire of running
my soul died tonight
no more soft rain
only a buried heart
no more tingling toes

i'll toss my fluffy socks
erase my smile
and hide my tears deep inside
dark thoughts kill lavender dreams
and gentle kisses in the rain


posted by kelly at 6:49 AM

Friday, May 02, 2003

am i your love
or your condemnation?
do i bring peace to your soul
or worry?
do my kisses tingle through you
or burn with bitter passion?

sometimes i wonder
if youd be happier inside
if there were no me
and i wish id not been there
so that you could be free
to be you


posted by kelly at 6:38 AM

Thursday, May 01, 2003

140 dead, their blood dripping from your spear
not for food, but for sheer love of slaughter
where do the corpses lie to rot in the sun?
did your boots fill orgasmically with blood?
did you scream with joy at each conquest
of one so innocent?

today you killed 140
today you lost a friend


posted by kelly at 10:08 PM


im thinking about quantum foam in a way i know was never meant to be
its unnatural
i'm such a heretic


posted by kelly at 7:10 AM


i'll touch the stars
with your fingertips
defy gravity
in your kiss
you will be
my singularity

posted by kelly at 6:26 AM

Wednesday, April 30, 2003

the morning so sweet in my lungs
chirping birds in the gentle sunlight
thinking of you
wondering where i should be
knowing its not where i am

wishing i had answers
hoping that the birds
will speak them
knowing that im lost
isnt that what love is?

wishing that there was something
that gave me peace again
it left me days ago
in sadness and tears
wishing that i knew my place

or do i have one?
i was never promised a purpose
or granted talents
nor even a quick mind that
i could learn

i have no graces
only dreams and wishes and tears
so i wait for the birds
i listen so very closely
they only sing your name

posted by kelly at 12:01 PM

Monday, April 28, 2003

i see your face in my dreams
your eyes twinkling
your grin pressed against mine
you whisper 'i love you'
and i tingle inside

you are my serendipity
ive found peace in you
what i thought i would never feel
i touch the stars
i cry at the beauty of the moon
and i whisper 'i love you'


Sun Apr 27

the story of bliss

the fire, the water
brought them together
tore them apart
she hides in darkness
he cries in waves

they dont know
cant share the pain
of forever
of the dreams
adrift in memories

flames of love
flames of death
moans of bliss
screams of pain
he didnt know

words, lost in time
fear, hiding in sleep
anger clenched
in fists filled
with love


Tuesday, April 22, 2003

what makes me smile?
you, your being
when youre not lost in all of the things
that take you away from me
your gentle touch
being your whore

the morning air
the sound of the birds
seeing your smile in the grey sky
music in my ears
peace in my heart
freedom in my soul

love, it doesnt make me happy
i realized that tonight
not that kind of love
the love that makes demands
the love that pushes me away
further with each goodbye

nights alone, watching you
i never feel so lonely as during them
your kiss, your smile, the words
they make my heart bliss
ill be anything you want me to be
anything for you

just let me be me
teach me, my mind is a sponge
aching to learn
so many things we know
so many things we never say
so different and yet the same

dont love me with a need that overpowers me
need me with a lust that carries me away
to our heaven
where my feet never touch the ground
i love you
dont possess me

love me like a flower
gently, softly caressed by the gentle breeze
of your soul
listen to me and dont scoff
accept what i feel inside
know that it is what i am

i am what you love
as you are what i adore
dont leave me to wait
say
i love you angel
come to me

i will rush to you
i will be your everything
tell me what to be and i will be
be for me my sweetness
my peace
not my worry

as i dont want to be yours
i want our time together to smell
of lavendar


Saturday, April 19, 2003

i thought you were different
like me but not afraid
i thought you were one with me
and i didnt feel so alone
in my insanity

i thought you were him
the one i dreamed about
i thought you understood
all of my fucked up feelings
how i felt about them

i thought you were like me
lost but never without a path
i thought you loved
and it was never a joke
hes been my peace so many times

thoughts are stupid


Wednesday, April 16, 2003

i trace your lips
with my fingertip
warm, tender on my skin
i melt inside
forgetting everything

brushing them with mine
the smell of you
fragrant, drifting
it carries me away
into a soft kiss

lost in you
forever
laying in your arms
listening to your breath
drinking in its song

closer, i never want to let go
of your song
of your breath
of your soft skin
of your perfect love


Saturday, April 12, 2003

i loved you as ive never loved
a few words took that away
not the love
but the ability to be
to love you freely and in peace

i cant change who i am
i wont change that ever
my smiles were of love
not degradation
only of the joy you gave to me

and now ive gone
and you wonder why
i try to explain but you dont understand
but then you never understood
what was in my heart

and i will always love you
and i will always hate the words
that made me leave you
that made me cry
took me from you forever

and us from us
if only i didnt feel
if only i didnt smile
if only i were perfect
if only i really were an angel

im not, im human
tears and flesh and blood
and forevers and nevers
and hello i love yous
and goodbyes that are for always


Monday, April 07, 2003

his eyes sparkled
like those of a child
every word he spoke
was peace and love and giggles
every kiss heaven on my lips
i fell in love
i loved the child in him
like the child in me

he grew up and i didnt
we fell apart
i dont know him now
we speak but the words
theyre more than i can understand
coming from his mouth
full of hints
that i cant take
full of i dont love the sparkle
in your eyes

grow up with me
he asks the thing i cant do
i dont want to do
grown up means so many things
losing so much
i want your sparkle
i need your kiss
giggles and peace and love
i miss you

i fell in love


i prosed cuz poetry, there isnt any in my heart today
sadness that you dont trust me to know
tears and so lonely
i wish he would come so i could tell him its okay
i can feel his pain so far away

happy he doesnt know it all
he wasnt loved or cared for
afraid hes gone away betrayed
by me
alone in his dark world

you showed me so much
but not what you meant to show
you showed me how you felt
the truth
how little you trusted

im not always wrong
or always right
i know tears, so well
i know betrayal
but i still love


i caress the first touch of sleep
praying for deaths soft lips to envelope me
to be in peace
to never cry again
to never be a fool
but i pray to a god who despises me
who i have no care for
and know that i will awake tomorrow
my lips cold with a new day
my heart aching for that which ive thrown away
waiting to sleep again
and to pray
to no one
for nothingness

Sunday, April 06, 2003

i love you, as i love him
friendship is everything
believing in each other
i would have felt the same way
if hed laughed at you
called you a liar
but he never would

and you
you never believe in me
its always everyone else
and i feel hurt
so alone
you cant see inside my heart
how it makes me cry
to feel so alone
every time

its not poetry, but its what i hear in my head
ive never felt so alone
as i do right now

Saturday, April 05, 2003

a tiny bit of light shone in
through the fine slats in the shutter
not enough to see by anymore
so i closed it
and lit a candle
it flickered
and went out


so i was dreaming about you
waiting to be in your arms
and i woke up smiling
you werent there

i waited so long for your kiss
but you disappeared from my world
and i felt so unimportant and alone
sitting in the dark

the days we get are so few
most burdened by outside forces
the nights of love and kisses
fade away in the gentle breeze

so i waited til i couldnt anymore
til i felt you so far from me
those nasty thoughts popped into my head
and i closed my eyes again

Friday, April 04, 2003

if only i knew how to sing pi
if only i understood quantum physics
if only i understood the meaning of anything einstien ever fucking said
then maybe

but i still wouldnt know how to make you smile

i still wouldnt know how to make you happy

i think ill rip off my lips


kelly bunny went hippity hop hop
along the merry trail
tripped on a rock and knocked out her teeth
landing in a leg hold trap
snap snap

Thursday, April 03, 2003

nothing and everything
i dont know what the fuck i am anymore
everyone loves me but no one really
its just, you know

so what am i?
the perfect little saint or the whore?
do i mean anything or am i just a smile in passing?
everybody wants something

i cry a lot, pain and thoughts
i feel like im gonna explode so i go to you
the only one i trust
and cry some more

im amazing and im shit
a shallow pretty song
that burns your ears
an empty soul full of tears

sometimes things are said
that can never be taken back
a tone of no faith
that brings a tear

sometimes love just isnt enough
and nagging doubts take over the heart
making me pull away
more each time

you say 'i love you, come back'
i do but feeling less with each half-hearted return
til one day nothing
and goodbye

Wednesday, April 02, 2003

once i believed in you
encompassing my every thought
i lived thinking of your gentle touch
my heart filled

i knew i didnt deserve your love
i was lowly
you were god
and then i found the truth

you took from me everything i loved
or allowed it to be taken
no gentle kiss upon my soul
to ease the pain

yes i believe in god
yes i believe in fairies and trolls
and in broken hearts
and pain without end


everything i try i fuck up
but you say im perfect, everything i do is heaven
people smile and say its okay
and i wonder why

i try so hard to do whats right
to make the world a more liveable place
for at least those i can touch
but i doubt me

i know im loved but wonder why
is it my face or my words or my reason for being?
if only i knew you felt me
some sense of peace

i love you, every last one
i wish that i could make your lives what you make mine
i wish i werent so harsh when angry
and could find my perfection

Wednesday, March 26, 2003

i realize that i mean nothing
everything else means more
stolen moments i feel sorry for taking
guilty for wanting your time

and so i give you freedom
that you claim to never want
i force it upon you and walk away
the dying of my heart

Tuesday, March 25, 2003

waiting, wishing for that perfection
the one i know will never come
lips and tender touches on my fingertips
kisses filled with bliss

where is the smile i yearn for
the words i hear inside my head?
shattered by too many moments
spent upon a soiled bed


torn flesh and soul, nails embedded
sleep within this mortal coil
eyes ripped out, beneath me lay
plucked by torrents of acid tears
broken wishes on my lips


i see you in the warm air, laughing
the sunlight dancing in your hair
dew of heaven on tender lips
the ones i dare not kiss

Wednesday, November 13, 2002

the ship was tossing, she held to the rail tightly
her fingers aching at the effort
her stomach churning, the ache inside growing
she looked out upon the waters
and back at what held her
letting go, she blew him a kiss
and jumped

Tuesday, November 05, 2002

tingles, my flesh filled with giggles
a smile on my lips.
your tongue caressing my breast
nibbles
a sweet throb running through me
and then
bliss


laying in the darkness, wishing that dreams came true
hopes of no more and of never again and of sleeping forever
clinging to false desires, losing her grip
she fell asleep and dreamed
of the ocean

Saturday, November 02, 2002

kisses on my forehead, fire within
pain making the promise of death appear as a wet dream
your touch, soothing my wounded soul
bringing back to me that which i have lost
back to the peace that once filled my heart

Thursday, September 19, 2002

his eyes light up my heart in their reflection of the love i feel for him
his touch warms my flesh like the kiss of an angel
laying in his arms, eyes closed, his lips against mine
this is the heaven i have found, my perfect peace

Sunday, September 15, 2002

if life is the question, then death is the answer.
i grasp it loosely, with greivance that i must.
longings pour through me, dreams of letting go,
drifting, the clouds in the sky, a myriad of colour,
as i enter sweetly into the gentle night.


such a fool, thinking forever meant always.
believing in dreams of perfection,
holding onto love like a newfound pleasure,
to be cherished always.

i listened to my heart,
to the sweet sound of his voice.
smitten, i did not run,
rather embraced what i had never desired before.

and now it has fled, like a butterfly on the wing
the soft winds driving it upwards
toward peace, a place where pain is unfelt,
returning to the cocoon from whence it came

wishing only that the winds
had carried me closer to him,
not driven us apart, love is eternal
and i am trapped in this place forever.


i sleep fitfully and awake to a world without light.
my dreams have fled and my heart is in tatters,
my reason for smiling, for laughter, for happiness, gone.
i live in winter, in melancholia, a life i chose
when i said goodbye.


my skin kissed by a gentle breeze,
your lips touching mine.
is this truly heaven?
or just a place in time?

touch me oh so gently,
make me want to cry,
but not with sadness this time,
with happiness, with joy.


we lay upon the sweet grass,
our bodies intertwined,
precious words of love
whispered softly in my ear.

i look at you and i feel your soul
your eyes burrowing into my heart
you are my life, my breath, my being
i can hide nothing from you
my faults nor my gifts
all are yours

you amaze me in your perfection
made for me and i for you
holding tightly to each other
in the night, and through the day
carresses of love and joy
peace fills me, overtakes my worries

with me always and forever
my eternity is full of promise
of you, of your smile and your touch
your words softly whispered in my ear
angel mine, completion of me
i love you with all of my soul


tonight i held you in my arms
smelled your hair like peace
i wrapped myself around you
feeling your breath
knowing you so deeply

you looked into my eyes and caressed me
i knew your love and swallowed it
warmth filling my belly
as one enjoined

happiness overtook you as you smiled
into sleep, into me


i feel you in the darkness, your hand touches my face. gently your fingers trace my lips. my body tingles, my breath quickens. slowly you undress me, enjoying every step. my heart begs for you to hurry, but you linger lovingly. i feel your skin against mine and i sigh a sigh of peace. softly you kiss me, your warm lips take away my breath. i feel your mouth embrace my yearning breasts, a moan escapes my lips. your hand parts my legs, feeling my wetness, my desire for you. your swollen throbbing need begs to fill me, and i to be filled. as you slowly enter me i tremble, near tears, wanting only all of you. my dreams come true as you move within me.my loves covers you with a flood of joy. our movements are a dance, our breathing a song, til the moment that you explode your passion inside of me and we collapse together as one.


sometimes death creeps up slowly,
and you feel his grip upon you
holding you gently, but firmly,
and you do not run, but rather
you wait, breathlessly, hopefully
wondering whether you will do battle
or to kiss his sweet face


the darkness that is me

the tears are within, but will not flow
the anger boils, bubbling near over
i contain as well as i can
heaven and hell dwelling, embracing
battle, war in the soul, bloodshed
kisses in my ears, teeth biting me
red pouring from torn flesh
boils fester on my heart
the sunshine, my enemy, the darkness,
my life, giving me peace, healing
there is warmth in the coldness
bitterness in the rays of the sun
air fills my lungs like acid, pain,
explosions, endings are beginnings
crystal raindrops turn to snow on
my skin, fire, cold burning
i've never sold my soul, nor will i
but touch death warmly, sighing
happily at the expectation of it
the warmth of the cold earth around me


the taste of you

your touch on my skin, eyes upon mine
i bow before you, swallowing you deeply within
holding you tightly, embracing your lust
my desire for you unquenchable
my hunger immense, greedy

my lips, my tongue feeling your warmth
the life pulse of you, throbbing
my heart races with yours
you fill me with divine love

the taste of you burns in my throat
a gentle burning, peaceful release
your sighs echo in my head and my heart
as i swallow the fruit to the depths of me

posted by kelly at 10:46 AM